Narcissists are one of the worst kinds of people to deal with in life. A narcissist is someone who thinks unreasonably highly of themselves. Their interest in themselves is excessive, leading to them ignoring the opinions and emotions of those around them. Apart from this kind of negligence, narcissistic abuse includes manipulation and indirect control. At the same time, any person around you can be narcissistic. Your partner, colleague, or even a family member can be one. Most of the time, narcissistic abuse is extremely draining and damaging. Usually, the two options available to the abused are either to leave the relationship or ignore and endure. Leaving is usually the more mentally healthy option.
So, how can you identify when you are dealing with narcissistic abuse? Here are ten quotes that you can match with the behavior of a person that you suspect to be a narcissist to help you:
Quote 1:
Narcissists are masters of pathologizing your emotions. They convince you that your emotional reactions to the abuse are the problem, rather than the abuse itself.
–Shahida Arabi
This is a typical trait of narcissistic abuse where they shift the blame onto the victim. Somehow, whenever you try to point out their toxicity, they always reply by saying that it’s overthinking on your part. Moreover, the way they say it makes it seem convincing. You must stick to your opinions and dig deep to break through this manipulation.
Quote 2:
Narcissists will use lies to try to destroy your life, often going deeper into lies, because they know their control over you can be destroyed with the truth.
It is not beyond a narcissist to fabricate every detail about themselves if it means having control and power over you. However, no connection can be healthy without honesty. So always try to speak your truth in your voice.
Read: 6 Phrases Narcissists and Sociopaths Use to Make You Feel Crazy
Quote 3:
The narcissist doesn’t actually want your love, as they don’t know what love is. They want your admiration and obedience as a player in their ‘metaverse’ delusional reality.
Unknown
Narcissists, by their very nature, have no clue what it means to love another. The most probable reason is that they never received that kind of love in their lives. For them, when you stroke their ego, letting them have control over you means the epitome of love since that plays into their self-love.
Quote 4:
Narcissists don’t change because they don’t want to change. They want to keep on using and abusing because it gets them the attention they so desperately crave. –Anne McCrea
A big part of narcissistic abuse is attention-seeking. Attention and love are the same thing for them. A part of it is being heard through conversation. They usually try their hardest to be the loudest and sole speaker in a conversation.
Quote 5:
Truth is like surgery. It hurts but it heals. A lie is like a pain killer, it gives instant relief but has effects forever. – Unknown
When you know, believe, and speak the truth, it will always set you free. However, lies can cover a wound for a short while, while in reality, the wound will only fester with time. Narcissistic abuse involves heavy and compulsive lying. This is because lies can be beautiful and what you want to hear, thus, letting the narcissist have control over you.
Quote 6:
If you don’t heal what hurt you, you will bleed all over those who didn’t cut you. – Unknown
Narcissistic abuse can leave very severe implications for your own mental psyche. You can suffer severe scars that can heavily damage the next relationship you have. As such, you must give your time to heal.
Read: How The Narcissist Gets Away With Abusing People And Come Off As A Good Person
Quote 7:
A narcissist will manipulate everyone around you to betray you too. This is not a reflection of who you are but more of a reflection of the narcissist’s power of manipulation and the integrity of other people.
Narcissists are masters of manipulation, and they won’t just exercise these heinous powers on you. Isolating you socially is another way of increasing your emotional dependence on them. As such, inexperienced friends or those who did not have much faith in you in the first place can turn against you. However, if they keep insisting on the lies being the truth, then you must think about if you want them in your life.
Quote 8:
A narcissist doesn’t care how they make you feel as long as they provoke an emotion from you. This makes them feel superior and powerful. If they can control your emotional state they still have you under their grip. Remember that.
The purpose of narcissistic abuse is to get your attention and to have control over you. Being able to control the emotions of anyone else, thus, becomes a very important marker of how successful narcissists are.
Quote 9:
You may not be in control, but you’re in charge.
Being in charge means making final decisions and leading. Being in control means knowing about and influencing everything happening. As such, this truth is vital for any person out there. There are lots of moments and situations in life when things are out of control. However, how you handle those situations or take charge of them, is in your hands. You must always remember this while dealing with narcissistic abuse.
Quote 10:
The only way to win with a toxic person is not to play.
A narcissist is always engaging in a game with you, where it is all about getting your obedience. The narcissist makes this game up, along with the rules, which they change whenever and however to give them the advantage. There is no way to win against this toxicity apart from refusing to play.
Keep Reading: 7 Reasons Why Confident And Strong Women Are Targets For Narcissists