There are times when you are just getting to know someone that you may come across certain situations or behavioral traits that appear as you feel each other out in the landscape of a new relationship. Keep in mind that everyone has their own ideas and their own set of expectations of what the hallmarks of a healthy relationship are. If you truly have found someone special, it may be far more positive in the long term to ignore the red flags until you know exactly what is behind these so-called warning signs.
We all have walls and fronts we put up to protect ourselves. Or instinctual coping mechanisms that may help us through stress or traumatic experiences. As we go through life, these situations shape who we are for better or worse — and we don’t always control this. We also don’t have always have that level of awareness to see the truth in an emotionally colored picture, as our perception is affected by so many variables. We so often enter relationships with rose-colored glasses in the way we see ourselves, our partners, and how we see our lives together in the future.
So What Exactly Is A Red Flag?
In short, these are telltale signs that foreshadow future interactions and dealings with a person. Each gesture, everything we say or do to one another, has implications behind it. Sometimes it may be ok to ignore the red flags in some cases. At the same time, other situations may allude to far more severe aspects of someone’s character (or lack thereof). So, it’s up to our own intuition and the level of trust we have: both in ourselves and our partners. This helps us to decide when and how to react when these traits reveal themselves, be it in us or others.
When you ignore the red flags, you may be allowed closer to your partner and gain greater insight into their emotional state, only to discover there was never a warning at all, but rather a simple miscommunication or lack of understanding. This plays such an important role in developing trust within a relationship. We allow each other to reveal our true nature rather than condemning or trying to correct one another’s behavior.
When Are Red Flags A Real Warning and What Should We Do About Them?
However, there are occasions where to simply ignore the red flags is not a viable option at all. In relationships, we may either expose or be exposed to parts of each other that require careful attention. It is often the biggest mistake to think that we can diagnose and help our partners emotionally with objectivity whilst being involved with them.
We all enter relationships with a certain amount of baggage, perhaps even from a previous relationship. However, in many cases, you may encounter signs of unresolved childhood trauma or abuse. This makes things far more difficult. These experiences often restrict our growth and limit our self-perception completely until we gain a proper understanding of why they occurred.
Depending on the severity, it may be necessary to seek psychological help as a couple. But, in extreme cases, you may need to change the nature of your relationship until your partner has had a chance to really work on themself. Relationships are not usually conducive to the change and growth necessary to overcome these burdens, as our immediate instinct is to always compensate for one another’s misgivings and behavioral deficiencies.
Remember that with each interaction, we gain a greater understanding of one another in relationships. The key is always to be grateful and celebrate each other for who we are, rather than trying to change or fix someone based on unrealistic ideals in our heads. Time will always tell us whether choosing to ignore the red flags was a fortuitous decision or not, so always try to understand where your partner is coming from, no matter the situation. It is both our similarities and our differences that bring us and keep us together. So, never stop learning about each other and leave room for surprises along the way.