You’ll often find that the most toxic people in your life started out as the nicest. But they weren’t nice- they were fake nice. We need friends in our lives; they help us to keep things balanced when we can’t do it ourselves. In fact, friendships are one of the most important relationships in our lives. But sometimes, telling the difference between the real ones and the fake ones can be tricky. Especially when you want to believe in the best in people.
How to tell if someone is fake nice or real nice
Here is a helpful guide to show you how to spot the really nice folks from the fake ones.
1. They will support your choices.
As long as they are genuinely good for you. An authentic friend will support your choices, goals, and dreams, whatever they might be.
2. They love the “weirdness” about you.
All of us have traits or quirks that are considered slightly odd. A real friend will love you for them- not despite them.
3. Real nice people will forgive.
We all make mistakes. Real friends, not fake ones, will accept that and forgive you when you mess up. You’re only human, after all.
4. Stay in touch.
Your real friends will stay in touch with you, even if there is distance between you both. They make an effort to talk with you, even when it doesn’t serve them. You’ll find that fake people only talk to you when they want something.
5. They make sure you are a part of their lives.
Real friends make time for you. It could be something as simple as coffee together on a Sunday morning, or even a short call after work. They let you know that they want to spend time with you.
As important as it is to be able to decipher the traits of real friends, it’s also imperative to recognize traits of fake friends.
Below are a few signs that someone is a fake friend.
1. Fake nice people have passive-aggressive behaviour.
Before you even know what’s happening, a fake friend will use passive-aggressive behavior to get their way. It usually comes off in the form of an insult, wrapped in the guise of a compliment.
2. The fake nice constantly let you down.
Fake friends will make plans or promises, and repeatedly let you down. Their words mean nothing, and if you mention the constant letdowns, they will come back with verbal attacks. They usually won’t feel guilty about it either.
3. Must be the center of your world.
They expect you to always put them first, even though they would never do the same for you.
4. Gossip. Gossip. Gossip.
One of the biggest red flags is gossiping. If your friend talks about other people behind their backs, what do you think they say about you?
5. They make themselves seem more important.
Everything is a competition with a fake friend. Instead of supporting you, they want to be better than you. Whether it is a promotion, how much something costs, who got the higher score, or any other number of petty things, they have to be the best and have the best.
Keep Reading: 10 Types of Toxic Friends You Should Steer Clear From