How to recognize manipulative or unethical behaviours in a psychic, healer or spiritual teacher:
Because this field is unregulated, and also because intuitives and healers can wield a lot of influence, it can on occasion attract the kind of person who is on a power trip. It can also attract people who have deep unresolved traumas or emotions that interfere with their ability to treat clients with respect and as equals (i.e. abusive people.)
You might be the kind of person who would not take abuse in your relationships, yet with a spiritual teacher or healer, abusive behaviours can knock you for six, because you might be open and vulnerable in your spirituality, and open to hearing from an authority, in a way that you might not be to the same extent in your relationship or friendships.
Again, the abusive ones form a small percentage of the people practising. This article aims to help you avoid those people.
Here are four red flags that I have noticed abusive or unethical teachers like to use:
(For purposes of brevity, I’ll call him or her a teacher all throughout this article, but I mean anyone who is either a teacher, psychic or healer, or perhaps all of those at once.)
1. When a teacher tells you that his techniques are better than everyone else’s, and that he has access to wisdom or teachings that no-one else possesses
No one modality is a ‘one stop shop’. No one teacher can be everything to one client or student. That is a good thing. I can’t imagine how insufferable a person might become, knowing they are the be-all-and-end-all for any group of people!!
2. When a healer invalidates you and challenges your subjective perceptions
Invalidation is when a person tries to brainwash you, telling you that the way you see things is not right. Invalidating seeks to distort or undermine a person’s perceptions of their world. It is an indication of emotional abuse when practised consistently. And it’s a form of emotional abuse that unethical healers use to keep you off kilter and not trusting your perceptions and your gut, because then they have more influence over you and you are more likely to agree with them.
3. When a teacher gives you an ultimatum
Other clients I’ve known have been told things like: you’ll never achieve X until you reach perfection or a place of complete healing as a person. It’s not true. God or Source (or whatever you would like to call it) never abandons us. Spirit doesn’t give us deadlines or ultimatums. If a healer or teacher does, it’s about their control issues.
4. When a teacher allows clients or students to put them on a pedestal
This is a big one for me. I am always suspicious of teachers who claim to be enlightened or perfected beings or those who are comfortable with being put on a pedestal. For me, this is a red flag because it belies a need for adoration or admiration that can interfere with the person’s work.
You might not notice these issues consciously, but often you will notice things unconsciously through your intuition. When this happens and something feels a little bit ‘off’, it’s because your unconscious mind has noticed something ‘off’ but your conscious mind hasn’t pinpointed what it is yet. So watch out for a feeling of discomfort even if you can’t explain the reason for it.