August 2, 2017 ·  5 min read

Are Some People Meant to Be Alone? 12 Signs You’re that Person

Everyone is inherently different. If you gave relationships a try and they just don’t work, you might be left wondering, are some people meant to be alone?

#1 You believe that it is better to be right than happy. It took me close to two decades of relationships to realize it is not better to be right than happy. A hard lesson to learn. Sometimes it is better to just keep your “rightness” in your head and acquiesce instead of holding out for the win.

If you worry about being right, then you likely spend a good chunk of your time proving it. What a waste of energy. If you can’t give in, you might as well give up finding someone.

#2 You believe there is no surrender in a battle. If you are a “fight to the death” type of person, then you aren’t going to be in a stable relationship. If all is fair in love and war in your head, you constantly wage battle. At some point, your partner will get tired of the cheap shots, anything to win attitude, and complete lack of empathy you display.

If you always go in for the kill, you kill any relationship you could potentially have.

#3 You like things a certain way, period. We all like things a certain way. I like to make the bed and then get out of the shower, put on socks, and make sure that my feet are completely clean when I enter.

But, if my husband gets off of work and barely has enough time to shower, then I say what the hell. If you always have to have things a certain way, then you are going to be very tiresome to someone who isn’t as into “the right way” as you.

#4 What’s yours is ours, what’s mine is mine. If you keep secrets or things to yourself or act selfish, a relationship is not going to be easy.

You put your own things aside for the good of a relationship, and if you can’t contribute or share, ever, then you are someone who is best solo.

#5 You aren’t willing to compromise, ever. Compromise is the cornerstone of any good relationship. Trust me, if you are a strong-willed person, then compromising is not a thing that comes naturally. But, it should come.

People never willing to meet someone halfway will always be on the opposite end of a good relationship, which means they might just be meant to stay single.

#6 No one will control you. If you think contributing to a relationship is tantamount to someone “controlling” you, then you might be better off alone.

When someone cares about you and your wellbeing, they make suggestions about how you should live your life, where you should be, or require you join the team effort. If that is equal to control, then don’t let someone control you. But, that negates a successful relationship.

#7 You like your “alone” time way more than having any “together” time. If it isn’t just about your belongings, but your finances and time that is all yours, then you are meant to be alone.

We all enjoy some time alone *at least you should for a healthy sense of self*. But, if you enjoy being alone far more than being next to someone, then it is time just to call it and realize that it is okay if you are meant to be alone.

#8 You don’t need anyone and prove it. We all like to be independent and figure things out on our own. If you have a chip on your shoulder and don’t need anyone and prove it time and time again, then there is no reason anyone wants to be in a relationship with you.

There is no “I” in team, so let someone help you once in a while even if you don’t like it for a successful relationship. Or, stay single. That is okay and your choice!

#9 Other people’s problems irritate you. If you don’t even want to deal with your own issues, let alone someone else’s, stay single. When you share your life and bed with someone, you share some of yourself, which means being there when they need support or a sounding board.

If you aren’t interested in being in anyone else’s entanglements, welcome to the club, who does? But, unless you want to be in a club of one, then you should care about someone else’s problems every once in a while.

#10 You are controlling. If you think you must control every aspect not just of your life but the person you are with too, then you won’t have a successful and happy relationship.

Controlling people are difficult to live with because they are the only people that make decisions. Sooner or later the person you are with will want to have a say. When that day comes, if you don’t give in, they will give up on your union.

#11 You are a loner, always have been, always will be. If you grew up all on your own and that is the way your role models lived too, then it is hard to turn that part of yourself off. Loners don’t need anyone.

But, to be in a successful relationship, you need someone. If not, they don’t feel invested in the relationship. You don’t have to handle everything alone, that is one of the perks of having someone else in your life.

#12 You don’t like chaos or company. If the only schedule you want to deal with is your own, then you probably aren’t meant to be in a stable relationship. When you live with someone, you work around not just their schedule but people important in their lives, too.

That means a lot of chaos and interruption in your schedule. If the slightest thing throws you into a tizzy, then you are better off staying on your own and doing your own thing.

Although humans are social creatures by nature for survival, that does not mean we were all meant to pair up for life, or at all. There are some of us just meant to be alone, and that is okay.