Everyone has their own moral code when it comes to the dating game. A person can only be pushed too far until they throw in the towel and call it quits. Some people can handle more than others, but there are some telltale signals that are pretty universal to most that will send you running—especially when it comes to men. Guys have a list, a code if you will, of items that they just don’t handle well when they are dating someone. After a while, they split if those behaviors keep running at full speed.
What are those behaviors? Well, some might be pretty obvious actions that you avoid on the regular, but some thing might be actions that you partake in day-to-day. We know how hard it can be to kick certain bad habits or ticks. Yet, it might not be too late to fix the behavior, but you should definitely take heed if you don’t want your man running for the hills. When you think about it, many of these antics are also conducts you wouldn’t want your significant doing to you either in all honesty. Read on to figure out if any of the behaviors we came up with are things that you’re doing to drive your honey away. And if they are, hopefully it wont be too late to fix them! Better late than never.
15. People Who Sit On Their Behind At All Hours Of The Day
Oh, the ever so famous, “But I’m so busy” without really accomplishing much throughout the day. It’s funny that a person can be so busy yet the bed never gets made and the bills are always late—what gives? Sure both parties are equally responsible, but if one side steps up to take this stuff on they should be on the hook for it.
It’s also frustrating after a long day to come home only to be bombarded with more work to do after your significant other was riding the couch all day. Yes, every now and then you just want to have a nothing day and that’s fine, but when every day is a nothing day it becomes unfair to the other party who is picking up for your slack. It’s not fair when you think about it. Like, no, thank you.
14. The “I Need You Now” Scenario
Sometimes you just need your own space. Just because you’re together doesn’t mean you have to do absolutely everything together at every single waking minute of the day. Even if you’re head over heals in love with each other, you’re bound to get sick of each other if you’re clinging to each other that hard. You have to let up on the reigns a little bit.
When your partner is always forcing you into doing things you don’t want to do for the sake of being together is when resentment starts building. He might want to play poker with the guys instead of having a Pretty Little Liars marathon and that’s okay. He should have a life outside of his partner, it’s the healthy thing to do. If you don’t understand that, he might reconsider your relationship.
13. Not Keeping Up Appearances…Ever
Not saying you need to be dressed to the nines on every occasion, but if you look like you just rolled out of bed all the time he might get a little disinterested. Think about it, when you first met him you were trying to impress him and you dolled yourself up—that’s who he fell for. Sure, he still loves you in your pjs and he loves cuddle time, but it isn’t a bad thing to break out the mascara when you go to the mall.
Sweatpants aren’t a bad thing either, but when you sport them on the regular it just makes you look frumpier that the beauty you are. Yeah, if you’re running to the grocery store to grab a quick loaf of bread then sweatpants are the way to go, but consider looking a little nicer when you step out to grab dinner together.
12. Letting The Laughs Die
Remember how you used to laugh the night away during the beginning of your relationship? Everything seems so serious now though with all the bills and upkeep that you busy adults have to do; you just don’t have the time for the silliness anymore. Wow, could this statement not be any more wrong. Yeah, things could get busy, but you always have to make time to enjoy each other or he is going to hit the ground running faster than a speeding bullet.
That’s not to say that your responsibilities take second fiddle, but there should be time carved out to have a little fun together whether it’s grabbing dinner or even watching a movie together over the weekend. Dust off those old inside jokes because guess what, they’re still pretty darn funny. Just don’t forget to loosen up and laugh a little!
11. Long Distance Relationships
Distance is tough. I’ll be the first one to say it. Unless the couple is 100 percent dedicated, it just isn’t going to work out. Many people want instant gratification and that is not what a long distance relationship is at all. Many men just don’t see the need to stick it out when they have exactly what they are looking for in their backyard.
Distance is a whole new set of issues on top of the standard relationship problems that you still have to face on top of this extra baggage. It’s a lot to handle, and most people don’t want to go through it, not to mention the time zones if it pertains to you. It’s hard to sync up and talk at a convenient time sometimes. All around, it’s just not easy, thus, it doesn’t work out too often.
10. Low Libido Lovin’
It’s no secret that part of the relationship takes place between the sheets, but if nothing is going on there, things can get a little dull for your partner. There are times where you just don’t feel up to it, but there should be times you compromise as well—it’s only fair, right?
When you don’t have a little fun in the bedroom it might lead him astray to find it elsewhere, especially if you started out your relationship spending many nights doing the horizontal bop. On the inside he might feel cheated because things used to be so different, and they now have drastically changed. Plus, who doesn’t want to feel passionately loved? That might be an important part of the relationship to him.
9. Oh, The Insecurities
“Am I as pretty as her?” “Why didn’t you answer your phone last night, were you with your female co-worker?” “Why am I so fat?” You know what I’m talking about. It gets really old really fast. It happens from time-to-time and that’s fine—we all have our moments. When it becomes a daily occurrence to question his integrity and your appearance, it wears on him heavily.
He wouldn’t be with you if he wasn’t attracted to you, so why are you making him question that? Also, not every guy is a liar, and it’s hurtful to assume that he’s sneaking around behind your back if he hasn’t given you a reason to believe so. It makes him want to run away and never look back if he has to deal with this day in and day out.
8. Way Too Brutally Frank
If someone asks you a question, it’s okay to be honest, but you don’t have to be rude about it though. Sometimes people, like your significant, are looking for answers and they do want to hear the truth, but they don’t want to feel like an idiot. Maybe they made a dumb decision, they knew it was stupid and they feel bad. They want to talk it out because it’s bothering them, but calling them out for being a fool isn’t right.
If someone is constantly the butt of the joke, they’ll probably become resentful as it can be abusive behavior when it is done over and over again. Who wants to stick around for that? No one. Certainly not your partner. Whenever you say something meaning it to be constructive criticism, always ask yourself if you’d want it presented in that fashion, then speak out.
7. Not So Keen On Kids Or Pets
Some people don’t want to ruin their routine with kids or pets, and there’s no issue with that as long as your partner is on board. The problem sets in when both parties have a difference in opinion because that’s a pretty big issue when you really think about it. In fact, it’s a real game changer. If you’re set on never having kids but he wants a family, how’s it ever going to work out? It probably won’t.
It’s a better combination to find someone that has the same values that you do, so you don’t have to force someone into a lifestyle they don’t want. Not everyone looks at freedom as their number one priority. A guy won’t stick around if he knows you don’t want to have kids while he does, and it honestly makes sense.
6. Heavy Mood Swings/Over Emotional
Who wants to be around someone that is always crying? Think about it, it’s a lot. Some people are more emotional than others, but sometimes the water works are just unnecessary, especially if they are only being displayed for attention. Breaking a dish doesn’t mean you need to go into meltdown mode, accidents happen and, if anything, your man is rolling his eyes when these things happen because everything is such a big deal.
Sometimes a good idea is to take a deep breath and compose yourself before you breakdown. Is it a big deal or are you making it a big deal? If it is a big deal then by all means get those emotions out, but if it’s a run of the mill issue, see if you can solve it on your own before blowing it out of proportion. He’ll get over whatever the conundrum is along with you pretty fast if you don’t.
5. Too Much Dirty Laundry
Everybody has their secrets. Maybe you ghosted your ex-boyfriend or went to the tank on your 21st birthday (bad!), but hey we all have our little oopsies. It’s when you have too many of these oopsies leaving a trail behind you that really becomes a problem. Of course, you want to be a little mysterious with your man, but let’s not hide a literal mountain of credit card debt or the fact that you haven’t been able to hold a job for the last four years from the guy.
Also, if you have a lot, and I mean a lot, of past hookups you might want to give your man a bit of a clue about it, especially if they’re the types that will show up at your home holding a boom box over their heads blasting “In Your Eyes” or something. When a guy smells too much drama, he freaks out. The clearer you are with him and if you show him you have a plan (and following through with it), the more likely he is to stick around.
4. Having A Constant Attitude/Feeling Of Entitlement
Okay, you’re at a restaurant and you ordered your meal. It seems to be taking a little bit longer than usual and your server seems frazzled. It’s Friday night, the place is packed, and you are not happy, so you proceed to verbally take it out on your poor server. Why not? It’s their job to keep you happy, right? Wrong. It’s not a good look to be rude to someone who is trying their best. especially if things aren’t derailing that badly.
Truth be told, you man doesn’t like that behavior either, and if he’s paying, he’s likely going to tip him or her more for their added trouble. It’s not their fault the kitchen is backed up, after all. Guys like things to run smoothly, they don’t like stirring up trouble unless it absolutely needs to be done. If you’re constantly making a scene—they’re out.
3. Flirting With Other Men
This one seems pretty obvious, but you’d be surprised how many people still proceed to do it. Guys don’t like when you flirt with other guys in front of them. Think about it, would you like your man to flirt with other women in front of you? Probably not. It’s one of those treat those how you would like to be treated type of things. Just don’t do it because it doesn’t make you look cool by any means.
There’s also the case of being “one of the guys.” No problem with that. However, that kind of behavior might come across as flirting when it’s not mean to be. In this case, talk to your honey and ask him what he’s comfortable with. Maybe introduce him to the friends he feels weird about so he doesn’t see them as competition.
2. Being Distant In Public
This is one I’ll never understand. When you’re out and about, you should want to act like you’re a couple rather than playing a game of cat and mouse. The chase gets really old after a couple of dates especially after you pass high school. If you don’t know what you want after going out on a couple of times, then it isn’t that person, so stop wasting their time.
Guys only have so much patience until their cost benefit ratio starts rolling in their head. What exactly are they chasing after if they aren’t getting a whole lot of benefit? As harsh as it sounds, men look at many things like a business deal and if things aren’t paying off they are taking off. They don’t need you hanging off of them, but if you show disinterest, they, in turn, become disinterested. It’s only rational.
1. Not Keeping A Minimum Level Of Respect During A Disagreement
Arguments are going to happen. I said it. Healthy relationships engage in disagreements because both partners feel comfortable enough to express their feelings, so they aren’t always a bad thing. How you express those feelings, on the other hand, can be. If you are shouting profanities and saying incredible hurtful things like how useless he is or how you can’t stand his mother, that’s not helpful—it’s hurtful.
When you argue like this time after time it becomes very abusive. These words can really stick with a person, and if a person feels backed into a corner, they might just leave. No one wants to hear these things all the time. You wouldn’t want to, and you can’t expect he would want to either. It’s not very nice, and nothing positive comes from it.