One of my favorite quotes is by Jim Rohn: “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” These words opened my eyes to the fact that the people we hang out with, the people we call friends, they all have an influence on the decisions we make in life, and therefore the success we have (or don’t have).
Unfortunately, not everyone pushes us to be better. Some people stop us from following our dreams or talk us out of taking a risk, and we don’t always realize that it’s happening. So it’s important to be aware and consciously choose who we spend time with, to limit spending time with toxic people—like these five personalities you should avoid when chasing goals:
1. The Complainers
Complainers are people who are always complaining about how bad their life or job or whatever is. They constantly whine about everything but never do anything about it.
Being around a complainer can take a toll on you—maybe you begin to join in on the complaints, and before you know it, you adopt their same way of negative thinking. That pessimism is contagious. Which is why you should think twice before sitting down with a complainer.
2. The Entitled
These are the people who feel like they are entitled to certain things in life, like they do not have to work for anything, that the people around them owe them something. They are also the ones who will try to talk you out of following your dreams.
This mindset can be deadly to a person trying to be successful. It blocks your determination and can kill your motivation in a heartbeat. Know this: You, or anyone else, are not entitled to anything. If you want the good life, you have to create it.
3. The Conformers
Conformers are the most popular of all. They are the ones who conform to the limits set on them. They do not have any dreams they are chasing after, and they are not doing something that goes against the status quo. They are simply living like robots—waking up, working 40 hours a week at a job they hate, going home, sleeping and doing it all over again.
There are many people who are content with this, and that is perfectly fine. But a person who is following their dreams simply cannot conform to the average life. So while working your full-time job, put in the extra effort on the side to start building toward something that’s more in line with your dreams. And eventually you will be able to leave your day job to pursue your passion full time.
4. The Party Animals
They’re the one who’s planning happy hours five days a week, the one who lives to go out every night. Sure, the party animal might be fun, but beware—they can distract you from your dreams.
Don’t get me wrong, you should take time to relax and clear your head on occasion, but bar hopping is not the solution and it’s not going to get you the life you’re after. By making partying a priority, you’re distracting yourself and breaking focus on your goals—things bigger than dollar beers and half-price apps. In order to grow as a person, you have to grow up first.
5. The Doubters
Doubters can be downers—they will listen to your big dreams, but they will be the first ones to tell you they don’t think it is a good idea or not to get your hopes up. They are the ones who believe you have to “be somebody” in order to do something extravagant.
As somebody who is chasing their dreams, this can be very discouraging, so identifying the doubters in your group will be beneficial to you and your success in the future. Likewise, it is extremely important to keep supportive people around you, people who encourage you and lift your spirits when you are losing motivation.
So, surround yourself with people who will support and encourage you to chase your dreams, through the good and the bad. Your success depends on it.