Sometimes, we don’t always notice another person’s true colors until we’re in too deep. Sometimes these narcissists can be people we love like a close friend or a boyfriend/girlfriend. But you finally realized this person is what they’ve always been: a narcissist. And now you want to know how to beat a narcissist at their own game.
#1 Know you can’t change them. This is the first thing to realize and fully accept. If you try to change a narcissist, you waste your time. First of all, you’re not a therapist. Secondly, this person doesn’t want to change. They’re in love with themselves. Have you ever tried to convince your friend that the person they’re in love with isn’t good for them? Yeah, exactly, it’s impossible.
#2 Do not reveal your emotions. Narcissists feed off of the information of others. They use information about you to get into your mind, create fear, and manipulate you. So, before you spill your heart out to them, revealing all your deepest, darkest secrets, don’t. The only thing they do is gather information about you and figure out ways to exploit it for personal gain.
#3 Detach yourself from them. Listen, as much as you don’t want to admit it, you’re attached to them. It’s nothing to blame yourself for. They’re very charming people, so it’s easy to fall for them. But now accept that you’re attached to them and detach yourself from them. Use emotional-detachment to stop the manipulation of a narcissist.
#4 Cut contact. It’s not going to be easy. They will keep you in their grasp for as long as they need you. Thus, if you cut contact before they used you completely, they’ll try every trick in the book to get you to stay. But cut contact, it’s that simple. Cut all the ties. Remove them from all social media and refrain from replying to any of their advances for attention.
#5 Put yourself first. Remember, if want to help someone, the most important thing is to put yourself first. It’s easy to lose yourself with the idea of helping someone else.
Remember, they’re a narcissist. Yes, help them, but always remember they look for what they gain from you.
#6 But if they’re a full-blown narcissist. Then even though you may be saying the right things, there’s little chance they reduce their narcissism with just your help. If this is the case, they need professional therapy. Even then, the odds of reducing their narcissism is limited.
#7 When you exhausted all the options, run. I’m sorry to say this, but if you tried everything there is in the book to help them overcome their narcissistic tendencies and they’ve been to therapists but nothing works, it’s time for you to leave. It sounds harsh, but nothing is going to change. Your emotions and feelings will continue to be used for their own personal gain.