When you allow someone to touch your soul and that person ends up being toxic for you, you must walk away from that relationship before you completely lose yourself in it. But it’s not easy to put an end to toxic love.
The betrayal that you feel is hard to bear, not only because you’ve invested so much on what you thought was true love but also because you feel that you’ve completely let yourself down for letting someone trample all over your love and good intentions.
You feel so confused because you’ve lost part of yourself in the process of realizing that this person is poison to your heart. You trusted your judgement and it failed you in such a way that you can’t make sense of how you ended up putting yourself in this situation that seems to be quickly dimming the light in your heart.
Part of you wants to believe that this person deserves yet another chance but that’s only your heart shifting to survival mode. You want to protect yourself from suffering, because it’s just too painful and scary to admit and accept the truth.
His true colors are way too clear for you now and you can’t deny that the longer you stay, the harder it will be to move on from the trainwreck your life has turned into.
The truth is, none of it is your fault. You can’t blame yourself for loving someone who’s not capable of receiving love. You’re capable of loving hard and you were willing to experience your emotions to the fullest and that makes you worthy of someone who can reciprocate the same kind of love.
It’s not your fault that you took a chance on the wrong person, but it’s on you if you decide to continue putting up with less than what your heart deserves.
You have the power to get out of this mess, you can change your situation, but in order to do that you have to stop putting all your energy on how he’s trying to drown you in his misery. You have to find the strength within yourself to put yourself first for once.
He’s damaged goods and you can’t change him, so you have to jump ship. It might be hard to come to terms with this reality but the quicker you do it the faster you’ll be able to put your broken heart back together.
Right now all you need is to get in touch with yourself. You need to find a quiet space in your heart to evaluate your feelings and find what it is that you need and want. Only you can decide what’s best for you and only you can do something to get it.
When you put yourself first something magical happens.
“…Because at this moment, the only one deserving of your love is you. It’s time to take the love that others take for granted and invest it into yourself” – R.H Sin
You have to trust and believe that true love is out there for you and that you will find it. It might feel distant right now but that doesn’t make it less possible.
Once you’re able to connect back with your core, a new reality will be available for you, one where the version of you that is independent, loving and strong gets what it truly deserves.
Leaving a toxic love is hard, but it can show you how strong and amazing you truly are.