It’s hard to deal with critical voices, especially when the voices are the ones inside your own head. Some of us are really hard on ourselves.
If you’re one of those people who is hard on themselves, you get it. We don’t like to ask other for help and we overthink things constantly. We feel awful if we make a mistake …then we worry. A lot.
In all honesty, it’s hard to be hard on yourself.
1. We’re tough on ourselves.
The moment you make a mistake or you feel like you don’t measure up, you beat yourself up. You replay scenarios in your head thinking of how you would have done it differently. You criticize yourself and you think about how you’ll do better in the future. Your thoughts are sometimes like a broken record.
2. But we’re not tough on others.
However, if a friend makes the same mistake as you, your are very encouraging and understanding towards them.
Even though you know this, it’s still hard to not give yourself the same courtesy you give to others.
3. We say “sorry.” (A lot.)
The moment we realize we’ve made a mistake, we usually apologize quickly. Sometimes we even say sorry when there’s nothing wrong or we haven’t made a mistake. Saying “sorry” a lot is a part of who we are and we do it even after we have been told that we are forgiven.
4. We overthink.
We overthink things all the time. Our thoughts cycle through our minds over and over. We wonder if we’re doing things right, if we did things right and if we’re going to do things right.
5. We don’t like to ask for help.
Asking for help is super hard on us. We like for others to think that we’re competent and resourceful. We like to appear as if we have everything under control. It’s really hard for us to ask for help.
6. But, we’re eager to help others.
Ironically, we’re quite eager to help others when they need it and we don’t necessarily view them as weak or incompetent. We understand that people need help from time to time, we just don’t like to be the one to have to need help ourselves.
7. Criticism is really hard to take.
It’s hard to take criticism whether it’s true or not. When we receive criticism, we can get somewhat consumed by it. We hate making mistakes. We want to do the right thing.
8. Even constructive criticism is hard to take.
Even if it’s called for and totally appropriate, we still have a hard time dealing with even constructive criticism. On a positive note, however, the good part about it is that we take it to heart though and we use it to make ourselves better.
9. It’s hard to receive compliments too.
Compliments can make us feel awkward. They can surprise us and catch us off guard. The funny thing is that we’re more than eager to dish out compliments to others, we just have a hard time receiving them.
10. We hate making mistakes.
The moment we make a mistake, it’s embedded in our brain forever. Even though we know that everyone makes mistakes, we don’t like to. Guilt sets in and we overthink the impact of our actions.
11. We’re emotionally guarded.
We often guard our emotions. It’s hard to let others in and we don’t want to let anyone perceive us as delicate, vulnerable or emotional.
12. We’re afraid we don’t measure up.
When you’re hard on yourself, it’s easy to find every possible fault with yourself, your life, and even your physical appearance. It’s a grass is greener type of thing. Because we know ourselves so well, we know all our faults. Even though we rationally know that no one is perfect, we worry we don’t measure up.
13. We want more.
It’s true that those who are hard on themselves can often be the ones who want greatness. Understanding that perfection and ultimate success is the goal, anything less is not acceptable.
14. We work really really hard.
We don’t quit until the job is done nor do we quit until the job is done well. We make sure our work is impeccable and worthy. We are hard workers and we get things done.